The day where forever was changed

I know I know. I've been a terrible blogger since I've gotten back. There's no excuse. I have way too much time on my hands but I just never feel like writing. The other reason is that my favoritest baby laptop that I own has died. It's also the only laptop I own so that should count for something. This past week was spent in Fresno. Oh yes. Fresno. While Mom and Dad went to spend their days at the Beach, I stayed at Gramma's house, with 2 birds, 1 aunt, 1 sister, and one 12 year old boy. It was a riot. From sitting in a treehouse reading the DMV handbook, playing dominoes and bananagrams, sitting in the DMV for 3 hours, watching depressing movies and staying up way too late, it was a pretty great 4 days. Even for Fresno. My last day was my favorite, sitting in Borders for 3 hours reading the newest book I've been waiting to read, having a man paint a picture of me, (creepy, yet too cool for me to care), and discovering my new hangout, where I will be spending the majority of my time while studying. Teazers World Market. Every kind of tea you can imagine. In a funky art-esque atmosphere that relaxes and calms you, just like tea. It's going to be a fantastic relationship.

The real reason for writing today is because today is the day forever changed. The day where my worthless life was made priceless, all because a man who did nothing wrong loved me enough to take on what I deserve 2,000 years ago. Today marks the day where forever was changed in my life, because my life doesn't belong to me anymore. Because of this sacrifice on a cruel and wicked cross. My heart is covered in the blood of his redemption. My hands are held in His nail-scarred ones. And my life is filled with the beating of his broken heart for me. 

Today was the day where I was meant to die. The day all my wickedness and all my foolishness was sentenced to death. Because I, smallest of all creation can't be in the presence of a Holy God while I am so impure and covered in dirt. But it all changed, with a soft-spoken whisper when the creator of the Universe called his son to take my place. To take my punishment, to feel my shame. So that we could be together. And when I realize and remember that sacrifice, I am humbled and ashamed. I am not worth it. There's nothing the human race can say that makes me worth it. But God decided I was. And with that knowledge, I stretch my arms out just like my friend Jesus did, and offer all of me up to Him, so that my life will mean nothing, and His will mean everything. 

Today's the day forever changed. Just wait until Sunday gets here.

What's all that white stuff outside?

So much for thinking I'd bypass the snow by moving to England. Apparently it missed me too much while I was away and just had to come back and surprise me. Well...Surprise! Wish the feeling was mutual.

Tomorrow will mark 2 weeks of being home. 2 weeks? It's gone by so fast and so slow at the same time. I think now is the beginning of "post-Capernwray" depression because I am definitely missing my castle and amazing friends. All I want to do is walk around the loop, make fun of the sheep, and drink copious amounts of tea. But, I am here. In a mountain that refuses to let Spring stay more than a week, waiting for something exciting to happen.

My days have a schedule.It basically goes like this: Wake up. Too late. Make coffee. Watch David Tutera's: My Fair Wedding, work-out with my favorite Tiffany, eat lunch, watch Say Yes to the Dress, help Malissa grade papers (Yeah, I thought I'd never set foot in school again, and here I am gladly grading papers...where has my dignity gone? Haha, just kidding), walking to the office, saying hello to my Mama, helping my favorite Jocey with wedding plans, coming home, making dinner, reading a book, and watching a bit of Gossip Girl before my eyes close and I sleep in my nice and pretty bed. Not too much for excitement. . But I'm going to enjoy these moments of nothing, because soon, when real life starts, I'm going to wish I had this back. So I'll savor them for as long as I can.

That's about it. Not too exciting, not too bad. Not too England, but, we all knew this day would come. It's been great seeing everyone again and catching up on life. Soon things will get real busy as we prepare for all those kids with a God-shaped whole in their hearts. It's going to be incredible. I can't wait to see what he does with this summer.

Now if only the snow will melt.....

Jesus' hands and feet were always dirty.

Whoever claims to live in Him must walk as Jesus did.
That sucker punched me in the face today. Actually, I think it’s going to continue to do that whenever I read it throughout my life. I claim to live in Jesus, but do I walk as Jesus did? Heck no I don’t. And whenever I see that and realize what I just said. I’m ashamed and humbled.

Let’s go back to what lead me to this. Over the past few months, I’ve been put on a roller-coaster called, “Do you trust me?” over the future. And while this will continue to be my ride for the rest of my life, the main theme of this ride was over Summer. Those of you who know me know I’m a Hume Kid. Since I was a little tyke this place filled with the smell of pine trees and dirt and the sound of screaming campers has been my home. It’s been a place I’ve come to love so much more since I left. A place of comfort, growth, and love. However, it also became my identity, and who I was and what my faith was, was defined by this place. Being surrounded by Christians who’ve known you, know your parents, know everything about you, makes it very easy to coast through the river of Christianity. I never had to work at my faith, because my camp did that for me. I never had to openly work at showing my Jesus to those around me, because at this place he IS everywhere around me. When I left for Capernwray, suddenly I wasn’t, Katie MacDonald, Hume kid we’ve known forever. Suddenly, I was Katie MacDonald, who we don’t know. My character had to be shown through my actions, and through who I portrayed myself to be. It was one of the most humbling and incredible things I’ve experienced in my short life. To suddenly be able to figure out who I was without Hume Lake being my whole identity. Suddenly, Hume was a part of my identity, but my character and my love for Jesus was who I was. It was freeing, and made my love for the place I call home grow so much stronger.

Now back to Summer. This will be my 9^th summer. Which means, yes, I’ve worked a lot of jobs. So far, I’ve been in every department except Maintenance. I’ve been blessed by that, and have gotten the opportunity to work my way up the ladder, you could say. These past 3 summers I’ve spent the best summers of them all in my favorite place, the Meadow, working with crazy junior highers, and loving every minute of it. This summer, I won’t be there. And that hurt. A place I had come to love so much is obviously not where God wants me this summer. And coming up to that point is hard, especially when it’s somewhere you believe you should be. I still don’t understand why I’m not going to be there this summer, but obviously, I have some things to learn, and who am I to mess with God’s perfect plans?

For a long time, I couldn’t imagine working any other places. I didn’t want to work anywhere else. I felt entitled to the job I wanted since I’ve been here 10 years. Entitled because of who I was. And that entitlement got me a smack in the face when I was rejected. I pushed for jobs, but not the “not-fun” jobs. Not the hard ones. Not the ones that required behind-the-scenes work. Because I was above all that. I earned my place at the top. I worked hard to get there. I was not going back down to the dirty floor for another summer. And in the middle of that rant, is when I saw a picture of Jesus. Bowing down and cleaning his disciples feet. He had everything, he was everything, he was at the top, and yet he got down and dirty to do as he said he was sent for. To serve. Even in the dirty, hard jobs. Even to do the jobs no one else wanted. And the tears came. Because the hypocrite in me realized my foolishness, and I was humbled.
If I love Hume Lake and these campers as much as I say I do, then I need to be like Jesus, and bow down and be a servant in whatever capacity I can do. And if that’s cleaning toilets, then it’s cleaning toilets in the name of Jesus, so that these campers can have an experience like none other, that they may come in contact with a magnificent, and awesome God who was the ultimate servant. Working at Hume Lake, had in a way, become a glory thing for me. I liked being at the top. I liked being up-there with the kids. And not all of that is bad. There will be more summers to do that again. But this summer, Jesus is teaching me to be a servant. And I’m going to be the best servant I can be. And love these kids the best way I can. Through showing them the joy that there is in serving the humble and righteous King, who humbled himself to serve me. And who knows what kind of situations I’ll be thrown into where my life and my love for Jesus can shine light to a campers heart.
I claim to live in Him. Now I need to walk as Jesus did.

Here's to a new adventure

And  new blog!

I figured, since I am out of England, I should make an Out-of-England blog. So that is what this is. A time, out of the teapot, as you could say. Continue to journey with me as I navigate these strange new waters of my future. A future made perfect in nail-scarred hands. I don't know where my path is going, but I'm starting to walk. And I can't wait to see where He takes me.

I hope you enjoy walking with me, and enjoying a cup of tea or two  as the adventure continues.

And here we go!